when you send a girl an emoji you’re legally agreeing to a psychological contract that manifests itself by means of a relationship
that why i just be sendin them hoes them dry smiley faces like :) cause you fuck around and its all like "b-b-but you sent me the eggplant and the wink emojis tho"
i don’t need that in my life
DONT BE AFRAID TO MOVE ON IF THE PERSON YOU LIKE DOESNT LIKE YOU BACK. GRAB A BOTTLE OF FRUIT PUNCH AND BAG OF DORITOS AND LIVE YOUR LIFE!!!
we need to sacrifice somebody so Ellen never dies
This is quickly becoming the Hunger Games for douchebags
THE 1ST ANNUAL DOUCHEBAG GAMES.
isn’t it weird to think that you might be drinking the water that someone drowned in and that you might be breathing in the same air that last left a dying person’s lungs and that gift you gave someone that was wrapped in recycled paper might have been someone’s suicide note and that the box jellyfish has 64 anuses
isn’t that weird to think about
this fucked fucked me up